BATTALION CHIEF JOSEPH GRZELAK, 52, of New York, was in a bowling alley in 1970 when he saw a woman and told his friends he would get a date with her. He did better than that _ the two were eventually married. Grzelak, a Vietnam veteran, began his career with the New York Fire Department in 1973. ``I didn't just lose my husband that day,'' Joanne Grzelak said. ``I lost my best friend.'' Grzelak had earned citations for lifesaving heroics during his career. A trivia buff, he even earned the nickname ``Joe Knows'' from his fellow firefighters. ``He was the perfect combination of a father and a friend,'' said his daughter Debra Grzelak.